________________________________________

最后一组到18。没人两杆上绿地，除非切进，没鹰推机会。最近的推10英尺，进鸟。片刻后，杰夫的朋友跑来。

“你们赢了！他们才16-17！”你们赢了！

他们欢呼。超级碗门票到手！

________________________________________

回到鲍勃家，三位妻子等着。球手们带了换装，准备出去吃庆功宴。

男人们和妻子在楼下等，只差马克。他扮女的打球真勇敢，骗过所有人，真为他们赢了比赛。今晚酒吧他们得请他喝个够。

“他咋这么久？”杰夫说。

“可能在刮腿毛！”鲍勃说，逗笑大家。

脚步声从走廊到楼梯。

“总算来了！”克里斯说。

众人转身，惊呆了。不是马克穿夏威夷衫，而是安德莉亚。她穿黑裙，深色连裤袜，高跟鞋，珍珠项链，头发扎紧髻。裙子微露乳沟。男人们不敢信假胸那么真！她妆比打球浓，惊艳极了。绿眼睛像在发光。优雅！美丽！

“安德莉亚！你好美！”艾米说，安德莉亚对她微笑。

“哇！”杰夫震惊，“你真像女的。”

“我是女的。”安德莉亚说。

“马克呢？”鲍勃问。

“这几周让我明白。我更爱做安德莉亚，从没喜欢做男的。这是我注定的样子，是我内心的自己。我之前没意识到。”

“你要干啥？”艾米问。

“我要永久改变。我要一直做安德莉亚，永不回去。”

“兄弟，清醒点！”克里斯说，“你是男的！”

“不再是了。”安德莉亚说。

克里斯无助地看艾米。她耸肩。

“安德莉亚，你明白这意味着啥吗？得告诉家人、朋友。得这样上班。得告诉所有人你是女的。”

“我懂。”安德莉亚说，“这几周我跟医生谈了。我开始激素治疗，很快植入假体。得等一年做大手术。但很快，我会是真女孩。”

“不！你不是认真的！”

“是的。我知道你不懂我的感受，但信我，穿上第一条裙子时，某样东西就对了。我不像你们有老婆。现在我知道为啥。我想做女的，胜过跟女的在一起。我更认同姐妹们，不再觉得被排外。我找到自己。”

他们出去吃晚餐，庆祝冠军。

“我还有个宣布。”安德莉亚在大家拿到酒时说。

“啥？”克里斯问。

“我不跟你们去超级碗。”

“啥！疯了？”他们齐说。

“那周姐妹们计划了旅行。我跟她们去。你们带布雷特或谁都行。我要跟姐妹们去水疗放松。”

男人们摇头。安德莉亚真投奔“另一边”了。他们举杯，杰夫提议。

“敬安德莉亚！我打过的最棒女球手！”

This story is dedicated to all the guys who think that women play too slowly on the golf course, or who think that we have it easy because we get to hit from the red tees....

Scrambled

by Jennifer White

It was Sunday afternoon, so the guys were out on the golf course. Just like every Sunday. Jeff, Chris, Mark and Bob has been golfing together for over ten years now. All were good golfers, but none were able to break par more than once per year.

They had started playing together in college. Now everyone but Mark were married, but they still managed to get out there and get their 18 holes in every week. They also went for golf vacations a couple of times a year, traveling to Florida or North Carolina to hit the best courses available.

But to them, the highlight of the year happened every fall, when they played the alumni golf "scramble" at the university they all attended. It was a very tough course, kept in perfect shape. The competition was really tough. But each year, spectacular prizes were offered. The cost was $250 per person, which helped raise money for the school as well.

"You're spending $250 for a round of golf?" said Jeff's wife Pam, when they all got together for dinner.

"Its to raise money for the school" replied Jeff.

"Can't you play a $40 course, and donate $100?" asked Amy, who was married to Chris.

"Its not the same!" said Chris defensively. The girls were always upset when their guys spent big money on golf. And this was no exception. They just didn't understand.

"And what's up with this scramble thing?" said Bob's wife, Liz.

"Its a best ball" offered Bob, but the look on her face made it clear that she didn't know what that meant.

"Everyone hits a tee shot" said Mark, "then you pick the best one. The other three pick up their balls, and all four players hit from the best spot. Then you keep doing that for the whole round."

"Oh, I see, so as long as one person hits a good shot, you're always hitting from a good spot."

"Exactly!" said Mark.

"Yeah, it means that Jeff won't have use three shots to hit out of the sand trap" said Chris.

"Hey, that was bad luck!" said Jeff. The guys would needle each other about their games. They were merciless. Pam, Amy and Liz played a little golf, but the guys didn't want to golf with *them*. They thought that women golfers slowed things down too much, and it kept them from having fun. They would whine about the drinking for example, or the cigars. And they looked down on the girls as inferior golfers. So the guys wanted to golf without their women.

* * *

"Did you see the top prize this year?" said Chris excitedly.

"No, what is it?"

"Four tickets to the Superbowl!"

"No way!"

The guys were in a frenzy. Tickets to the Superbowl? The biggest football game of the year? In some exciting warm weather city like Miami every year? They would go for a week to party, play golf, and watch the game itself.

"We *have* to win this year" said Bob.

"You've got that right!" said Chris, who was already filling out the entry form for the team.

That Sunday, the guys had a tee time at the school. They wanted to practice there as much as possible. It was early July, but the big tournament wasn't until September. They started their round, and took notes to prepare.

On the second hole, three of the guys hit their drives into the water or out of bounds. The problem was that the wind was in their face, and they had to hit the ball 200 yards to get over the swamp. Then the fairway bent 90 degrees in a severe "dogleg".

As they hit their next shots from the drop area across the water, Mark shook his head.

"Look at that. The lady's tees are way over here. They don't even have to cross the water. That hardly seems fair."

They all griped about it, and played the hole out. It was true: the women got to tee off where they could just hit a drive down the fairway, without having to cross the hazard. It meant that a woman hitting a grounder 25 yards would have a better drive than a man who hit the ball 250 yards. And if she could hit it 150 yards, it would turn a difficult hole into an easy birdie hole.

This made the foursome notice that on the 3rd hole, the women's tee were again in a place which would give the ladies a huge advantage. It was a par 3, but the men had to hit their tee shots through a tight chute, created by trees on both sides. The lady's tees were far enough forward that it was in the clearing. And they were short enough that the water and sandtrap weren't really factors like they were for the guys.

On the fourth hold, the women didn't have to hit over trees if they wanted to cut the corner. Again, a woman who could just hit the ball 150 yards would be able to set up the hole for an easy birdie. But for the men, it was hard not to lose a ball off the tee.

When they completed their rounds, they were all griping about it. They got quiet when they noticed Bill Campbell walk through the clubhouse. He was a great golfer, and his team had won the scramble two of the past three years.

"We need a ringer like that" said Jeff.

"Yeah, then we'd win for sure" said Chris.

"But we can't break up our group! If its not us four, then it wouldn't be right" said Mark.

"Yeah, if we bring in a ringer, they'll want the tickets we win. Who would play with us then give up Superbowl tickets if we win?"

"*When* we win" corrected Jeff.

"What we need," said Mark, "is a good *woman* golfer."

The others laughed.

"No, really. If we had a good woman golfer in our group, think what it would do for us. We'd get birdies on 2 and 4, instead of struggling for a par. We would be in such good shape on so many of those holes! And even if she hit a short shot, we'd still have a good safe ball in the fairway, so we could take chances and go for it."

They thought about it for a moment, and it was true.

"Three problems" said Jeff. "First of all, where would we get a good woman golfer? None of our wives would want to play. Second, if we did that, we'd be breaking up our group. And third: what fun would it be if we had to golf with a chick? She'd cramp our style."

"Unless...." said Mark.

"What?"

"Nah, stupid idea. Never mind."

"No, what?" said Chris.

"Well, you'll all laugh at this, but what if got a man who could play from the ladies tee?"

"And just how would you do that?"

"Make everyone think he was a woman."

"You mean, get one of us wears a skirt, and plays from the red tees?"

"Yeah, but it would never work" said Chris. "They'd pick us out for guys right off."

"Unless we really work on making him look like a girl" said Bob.

They all laughed, and moved on to talking about baseball.

* * *

A couple of days later, everyone got together for dinner at Bob's house. They guys were going to head up north Friday for a long weekend of golf, and this was the chance to do the final planning. When Mark arrived last (us he usually did), he found that he was in for a surprise.

"What?" he said, as everyone stared at him when he walked in. Amy and Pam looked at each other, nodded their heads, and smiled.

"No, what?" he repeated.

"Mark, I have some good news for you" said Bob.

"Yes..." he said doubtfully. This didn't sound like good news coming.

"You're not golfing with us this weekend. We're taking Brett instead."

"What? But I took the day off work and everything! How can you leave me out? I need to prepare for the golf tourney too you know!"

"You will be preparing. But in a different manner" said Chris.

Mark gave him a glare.

"You are going to spend the weekend with the girls" said Jeff. "They are going to give you a makeover, and teach you how to pass as a girl."

"No way!" said Mark.

"Yes way!" said Jeff. "We talked it over with the girls, and they thought it would be a lot of fun."

"Why do I have to be the woman?"

"It was your idea" said Jeff.

"And you're the smallest of the four. You'd pass the best."

"I'll never pass as a woman!" protested Mark.

"Wait until we get through with you" said Amy. Mark didn't like the tone of her voice, or the implications.

"We'll put you through boot camp this weekend" said Pam.

"Or as I like to call it, 'boob camp'!" added Liz.

Everyone laughed. Except Mark.

"Do you want to win the golf scramble or not?" said Jeff.

"And let us all down" said Bob.

"Come on, take one for the team!" said Chris.

They kept pestering him, even the girls.

"It won't be so bad. Come on, party with the girls for a weekend!" said Pam.

"Yeah, we'd love to hang out with you" said Liz.

"Don't you want to find out what we do when the guys are away? What *we* do for fun?" said Pam in a teasing tone of voice.

It was all too much. He wasn't excited about it, but he was getting so much pressure from everyone.

"Okay, I'll do it!" he said. "But if it doesn't work out this weekend, then that's it."

"Agreed!" said Bob.

They all raised their glasses to drink to it. Mark reluctantly lifted his too and took a drink. He would need several drinks to get through this ordeal.

* * *

Friday morning at 7:00am, the four guys met at Jeff's house, along with Amy and Liz. Soon, Brett showed up with his clubs. He climbed into the SUV with Bob, Jeff and Chris. Mark and the girls waved good-bye as they pulled out of the driveway, and headed out towards their golf vacation.

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