"Alicia" she replied. "She's four months."

I looked at the women's wonderful large breasts, no doubt full from the milk. I suddenly found myself walking again.

"Have a wonderful day!" I said, but it was Erin in charge again.

Now why did it happen again? There went my theory about the clothes. What do clothes and a woman with a baby have in common? I couldn't think of anything, and I started to feel angry at first. But perhaps this was good. It was twice in a week that I had been able to surface. Maybe with time it would become more frequent?

* * *

That turned out not to be the case, because it was ten days before my next episode. I was going pee in the morning. When I wiped myself off, I saw that I was spotting.

"I better get a tampon" I thought, and was surprised to find that *I* was the one walking over the cupboard (I knew by now where everything was), grabbing it, and sitting back down.

I peeled off the protective plastic covering, spread my legs wide, and looked down. There it was. My special female spot. I wanted to touch it, explore it (period or not!). But when I ran my finger tenderly over my labia, I suddenly found that I was no longer in control. I was now just an observer again, as Erin put the tampon in, and went about the rest of her routine.

What now? Clothes, babies, and tampons. Well, they all had one thing in common: women. Perhaps it had something to do with that. I had thought something that a woman might think, and for a brief time, that made a connection with my new body. But as soon as a male thought entered my head, the connection was gone.

That sounded like something feasible. I would have to test it out. I waited until she walked into her closet, and grabbed a pair of khakis.

"I would look good in a skirt today" I thought. And sure enough, *I* was able to pull one down, and put it on. I tried to be careful not to think any male thoughts, but sure enough, after a few moments, I lost it, and fell back.

I was elated though. I had just found out the secret. I could be in charge any time I wanted to. All I had to do was to think feminine thoughts.

* * *

Over the next few days, I made sure that from time to time, again and again, I would take control of my new body. I was able one time to keep it for twenty seconds! Then a minute! Then five minutes. I was slowly getting better and better at it. After three months as Erin, I now had enough confidence that I could possibly 'drive' for an hour at a time.

It was getting easier and easier for me to do it. Perhaps my brain was now making more connections with hers, or with her body? In either case, I was very excited to find out something else one day: after being in charge of my wonderful new body for almost 45 minutes, when she took back over, I could swear that I could hear something faintly. Her thoughts!

* * *

I had to really concentrate, and try to be quiet, but I could now hear what she was thinking! This made things *so* much easier for me. And the more I did it, the easier it became to hear her. Having a chance to hear real feminine thoughts helped me to understand how I had to think to stay in charge. That let me do it for even longer and longer times. Soon, you couldn't even tell if it was me or her in charge. It was like we were the same person.

This was great. It was so wonderful to do what I want in my body! This is what I had wished for. The learning experience of 'tagging along' for these months was worth it. It was really training me on who I was, what I did, and how I did it. It was just so wonderful.

When I was "running things", I found that I could do things like put on my makeup, with her expert hand. It was like I was in charge, but I knew what she knew. I had her knowledge and experience inside of me, and now I was even able to access that, as easily as my own memories. I knew that it would only be a matter of time until I could keep all of my thoughts feminine. Then I'd be 100% in control, full time.

I spent hours searching through her girlhood, and reliving those moments. All the things I missed that I had longed to do! Some of the older memories were blurry, and sometimes it was only a *feeling* that she remembered. But I was able to access all of that, and gain an even better understanding of her. This of course let me do a better job of being in control, and for longer times.

I was so happy! I was in heaven. I was able to really be a woman! And soon, I would be able to take over completely! I was just drowning in her.

* * *

This was so exciting. I was finally a girl! I had everything I had ever wished for. It was the most wonderful thing in the entire world, to be a girl. I felt more and more at home in my body, and now that I had trained myself to think thoughts in the feminine way, it was becoming easier and easier to stay in control. I didn't even keep count anymore of the time. It just flowed. I was able to think feminine thoughts all of the time really. I also found it incredibly easy to access my girlhood memories now.

The only thing that might have bothered me is that I'd be her for long periods of time, and when I came back to being me, I felt weak and confused. It was easier to slip back into the female thought patterns that my brain was now trained for, than it was to be male, which took work. I just didn't have the strength to fight for it. I just let myself be my female self again.

And not only that, I had a very busy life to lead, balancing classes, exercise, fun with my girlfriends, studies, a part time job to pay for all the new clothes I kept buying, and most of all, Will. I just loved what he made me feel inside. I was falling deeply in love. The way my body responded to his touch, I knew that he was the one I had always waited for.

I kept him 'waiting', like they train you to do since you were a little girl. He was of course eager to push further and further. One day I let him feel me up when we were kissing. The way he touched my boobs (instead of pawing at them like an animal) really impressed me. I knew then that he would be gentle with me.

Perhaps that is why I didn't make him wait any longer, and finally gave in. We made love that night, and it was, just...oh wow! How can you describe that feeling? I had waited my whole life for it, and now that I felt it, why did I wait so long? Well, it was the right thing to do, to make sure that it was a serious relationship, and not just someone after me only for the sex.

Things just kept getting better and better with our relationship, and I was just glowing and beaming all the time. I let my studies slip a bit, but there are only so many hours in the day!

* * *

When I was cramming for finals, I was excited. I was going to take Will home to meet my parents. If I did good on the tests, that would more than make up for my little slipping in the grades. Ever since I was a little girl, I had good grades, so my parents expected me to come through.

Perhaps it was the stress or something, but during this last semester, I had several times that I kind of drew a blank, like I was in a daze, or about to faint. I considered going to see a doctor when one day I realized that I had to really think about what I had done the last week! But my friend Amy told me that she felt the same way when she got deep into the semester, the time flew by, she would often feel the same way. So perhaps I was just overreacting.

The studying must have paid off, because not only did I ace my Biology exam, I even got a 97 on my math test, and that was my worst subject! Going in to the semester, I was dreading that class. There is *no way* I would have expected to come through with such a high score! That would make my folks proud back at home.

I hung out with Will for that last day before we left. He was watching a stupid baseball game.

"It's almost over" he said, handing me a beer. "And they're bringing in Jackson next inning"

"I thought he had rotator cuff surgery. His arm is still weak" I said, surprising myself. I must have read that somewhere in the paper.

"You know more about baseball then you've let on Erin. I'm impressed. You're the first girl who has done something like that for me. That's why I love you so. You really know how to talk to a guy."

"Oh, it was nothing" I said.

But that bothered me. How did I know that? Oh well, it impressed him, and he was in love with me! So that was a good thing, because love is all that matters.

As we watched the end of the game, I thought I heard something again. The other day when I was alone, I could have swore that I heard a male voice yelling for help. But there was nobody there. It must have been in my head. And there it was again now, but much quieter. That's it, no more beer for me! I wasn't going to drink if it did things like that to me!

But the voice was quiet now, so perhaps I had just imagined the whole thing. I held Will's hand, put in on my lap, and looked into his eyes as he turned the game off with the remote, and kicked the door closed. We had one thing left to do (again) before we went home for the summer.

As I laid down in the bed with my legs spread wide, I thought about the wish I had made earlier that year, that I would find the man of my dreams, and be able to get him to fall in love with me. In the past, I was so 'girly' that I turned guys off after a while. I just couldn't talk to them. But I wished that somehow I'd learn what I needed to be able to communicate with a guy, and get him to really like me. I guess wishes really do come true!

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