And then there was the period thing. When women live together in close quarters, for some reason, our periods start to sync up. Nobody knows why, but it's true! Over time, all the girls in the dorm were more or less on the same cycle. But she never seemed to get the mood swings, the bloating, the cramping like I had.

I was having a really bad period that time, and I had to go change my tampon because I was flowing too much. I went into the cupboard we shared, and noticed that I was on my last one. I wanted to grab another for my purse, just in case. So I was going to take one of hers. But she didn't have any! And no pads, no anything. Did she even *have* periods? It didn't look like it.

But I felt like I'd be prying if I asked her, so I let it slide. But now I felt like something was wrong with her.

* * *

Still, I considered Ashley a close friend. We did a lot of things together, had a fun time together, and she seemed to be loosening up a bit. She was doing better in social situations, although if we were at a party with boys, she became very very shy. I was dating this cute rich boy named John, but she never seemed to have any dates.

But then there came a time when he hadn't called me for the last three days, and I had been so upset, wondering why he hadn't phoned.

"He must hate me. He thinks I've gained weight" I told Ashley.

"No way Kate, I think you've lost weight if anything. Don't read too much into it."

"But what does it mean? He hasn't called for three days! There has to be something wrong. He doesn't like me anymore. I did something wrong to upset him" I said.

Then the truth emerged a few days later. I found out from a friend in the next dorm that he was sneaking over there, and messing around with another girl from our English Lit class! And she said that he had been chasing after anything in a skirt. The nerve of him! I thought we had something special going. I had to march over there, confront him, and break it off on the spot.

When I got back to my room, I was just livid. I really needed to talk to Ashley, so I could get the frustration out of my system. But she didn't seem to know how to *listen* when I talked. She kept interrupting me, and wasn't really listening to me. I got more and more frustrated. I had to leave her, and find someone else to talk to.

After all that, I had her written off as one weird girl, until 'the incident' happened.

* * *

I came back from my lab one day, and really had to pee. I saw the door to the bathroom was half open, so I knew Ashley wasn't in there. She always locked it. I walked in, and surprised Ashley as she came out of the shower. And I use the term 'she' loosely, because between her legs, she had the body parts of a man.

At first I was outraged. I was floored. Fraud! Deception! Ashley was a man, and had been living with me for months! A pervert! How could she do that to me! How could she!

I was about to blow my top, and call for the police, when another thought hit me. Ashley had never done anything in any way to even remotely resemble a sexual advance towards me. She could have seen me naked in the shower many times, but had never done that.

When I had thought she was observing me, perhaps she was. She was trying to learn how to be a girl. She was here to get an education in more than one way! I felt an onrush of sympathy for her. How must it feel for someone to be out in the world, but in the wrong body? She hated being a man so much that she was becoming a girl.

How could I hate such a poor soul? How could I not try to help her? She looked up to me. I was like the sister she never had. I had no choice but to feel sorry for her, and want to help her. I started to cry.

Ashley came over to me.

"I am so sorry. I know you must feel betrayed. Please let me explain."

I nodded as I blew my nose with the tissue she pulled from her purse for me.

"Ever since I could remember, I knew I wasn't really a boy. I had a boy's body, but I knew that I was really a girl. I wanted to play dolls and tea parties with the girls in the neighborhood. But if their mom's caught me trying to wear one of their dresses...I'd get kicked out, and not allowed to see them again. So even when I was young, I felt that I had to keep it a secret."

I nodded again. She was really opening up and expressing herself to me for the first time.

"As I got into puberty, I was upset as my body started to change. Imagine how you'd feel if you started to grow hair on your chest instead of boobs. Or if your voice started to deepen, and you started to grow a beard."

"Gross!" I said.

"Exactly. I hated my body. So I started taking female hormones. At first I stole a bottle of estrogen from the old lady I did yard work for, but after a month, it was gone. I stole a dispenser of birth control pills from my older sister, but that wasn't a supply I could keep getting either. Then I finally got a job in a doctor's office, working on the computers, so I could steal a few pages of paper from his prescription pad. Add in some sloppy handwriting, and I had a twelve month supply. I took ten more pages so I'd be in estrogen for years to come."

"So that's why you have real breasts?" I said.

"Exactly. But you're lucky. You've been getting natural hormones since you were 12. I've only been getting them for five years, and I still have the stupid male hormones interfering with my body. The only way I can fix it is to get 'the operation'. But do you have any idea how much that costs? I've saved every possible penny that I can, and I'm still thousands of dollars short. Insurance won't pay for it, even though to me it is a medical problem. Do you realize how many operations I've had so far, not to mention the electrolysis? And they won't pay for any of it!"

"That hardly seems fair" I said.

"So I have to save up. I was hoping to have enough money by the end of the year to get it done. I couldn't afford a single room here, and you have to live on campus. There is no way I could live in the boy's dorm. They'd all fear me and hate me. So I had to live with the women."

"And I'm the lucky girl" I said.

"I am *so* sorry!" she said again.

I came over and gave her a hug.

"Don't worry Ashley, your secret is safe with me. I'll be a sister to you, and teach you about how to be a woman. You've done a great job, but you have a lot of things to learn."

"Why are you so nice to me?" she said, now in tears herself.

"Once you're completely a woman, you'll understand things like empathy. How could I be mean to you when you're suffering so? You just want to be female."

"Like you" she said. "When I see you, I see what I want to be."

We smiled through the tears and hugged again. We would be friends for life.

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Ashley and I became very close. Now that she had shared her secret with me, things really opened up between us. We really did become like sisters, doing everything together. I taught her many of the little things about being a girl that she had missed. It was like she now had another class, and I was the teacher.

Time can fly when you're at school, and it was only three weeks until the winter break. We were both very busy with our studies, and had very little time for extracurricular activities. But one day, I received a phone call. From John.

He said that he was really sorry for all that he had done, and he finally realized what he was missing; me! He said I was the most special person he had ever met, and that he was so sorry, and would I give him one more chance?

My heart pounded. Against my better judgment, I decided that I'd give him another chance. I had the hots for him anyway, and it had been too long since I had a lover. So I agreed to meet him that Saturday night for dinner, dancing, and who knows what else after!

* * *

I started to hit the gym every day. I wanted to look my best for my date. I hated how fat my thighs looked. No matter how hard I exercised, the weight there just didn't want to go down. I redoubled my efforts. I was going to look good in my skirt! I just had to!

I was there on Thursday as the gym closed, and started to walk back across campus, wearing my sweats. I looked down and noticed that my sneaker was untied, so I sat on a bench and retied it securely. It was dark and I didn't want to trip over myself. Now *that* would be embarrassing.

But as I was hunched over (I did the second one too just to be safe), I heard a familiar voice. John! I was a mess, covered with sweat, wearing scruffy sweats, my hair all over the place...I couldn't let him see me like this! I ducked behind the bush so he wouldn't see me.

He came down the sidewalk, talking away....holding a girl's hand!

"You're so special to me, babe" he said, looking her right in the eye. "Over vacation, why don't you come visit me in Florida? I'll be on my father's yacht, and there's lots of room".

If I had a softball bat, I probably would have jumped out and knocked him in the groin. How could he be with someone else, just two days before our big date? Everything he said to me was a lie! I couldn't hold back the tears. How could I have been so stupid to trust him? I was such a fool. I ran all the way back to my room, and cried as I got into the shower.

Ashley heard me sobbing as I let the hot water run all over me, like the hot anger was surging through my heart. For the first time, she entered the bathroom when I was in there. She finally had enough feminine confidence to do that. I was proud of her, even through my inner seething at John.

Looking at her, and thinking of him, I suddenly had an idea. A wonderful, awful idea. Something to help Ashley, and to get even with John, all at once. I leaped out of the shower, and explained my plan to her. She smiled. We were going to be wicked to him.

* * *

I didn't confront John about being with the other girl. Instead, I gave him a ring, and told him to wear it when he picked me up, as a sign that he was willing to change for me. I told him I'd be ready at 6pm.

At 6:15 on Saturday he walked through the door, wearing the ring as instructed. He found Ashley doing homework, reading a book on the couch.

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